Determining a FULL body YES!
I want to talk about how truly listen to your inner guide and how to truly drop into your heart to make empowered choices from a place of inner truth and guidance.
You are your own guide and guru and we want to support you in making empowered choices.
How do you determine what is your YES, and what is a triggered pull or a no?
When it comes to matters of the heart we think that the sensations of butterflies in our belly, the heart flutters or the full body flush is love or a crush or chemistry. This can be a missed message from our bodies telling us something different.
Sometimes what is actually happening in these situations is the person you have this experience with is actually a perfect wound match and the sensations that we equate to LOVE are actually what I will call a trauma trigger.
This also happens in other areas of life which is why I want to speak to it today.
The importance of choice and truly knowing what our internal yes is can be EMPOWERING.
When we can differentiate what is a trigger and what is the gentle pull of a true yes we can make more empowered choices. When we are attracted to something or someone we want to look at where the attraction is originating in our bodies. Why are we moved by them, are we moved through our void or from our values?
This happens in marketing too, it tends to pull on our voids, what is wrong with you and then selling you something that we have in order to fill that void.
What if instead, we came from a place of completeness rather than our inadequacies?
When checking in with yourself in these situations whether thinking you are in love, or searching for a healer or finding a class to take or a training to join etc. Consider trying out this practice of Self Inquiry..
What am I noticing in my body?
What sensations are moving through me?
What is the pull I am noticing within myself?
Where is it originating?
Is this relationship (situation) going to serve my joy, my healing, my pleasure?
These are a few questions you can ask yourself to get clear on what is happening within yourself to make more empowered choices that end the end aren't aligned with the parts of ourselves that self sabotage or are wound matching with another.
As far as working with practitioners another practice that I use is to notice how I feel in their presence.
Do I feel empowered when I am with them? Or do I feel they hold the power.
In all relationships we are subconsciously navigating power dynamics and for myself, when someone is a match for me, I feel a tenderness in my heart, I am able to fully be in myself while relating with them. This is for both friendship, partners and practitioners.
The last thing I would like to share is that the gentle pull of a yes is often very subtle. It's not loud and convincing. It doesn't often work with a narrative thought process. It is just there, quiet and in the background.
A trigger often works with the narrative of the mind, there is a convincing story, an impulse to move out of your body, rather than the yes which is a subtle leaning in or leaning back. Each of us have different ways our bodies speak to us (check out the conversation from Day One of the Symposium 'Our Bodies never lie', with Tobin and myself. We go deeply into this)
This is a pattern I see a lot and I am often working with clients and students who are healing from these relationships where they thought someone was a a yes, that is was love, or chemistry, or joy and pleasure.. and in the end it was traumatizing.
To complete, I also have the foundational belief that we all get what we need in order to grow, there are no wrong decisions, even though I hate it when I make what I think is a wrong choice! I consider the toxic relationships or crap interactions to be a part of my Ninja training! I am now a Certified Ninja! Jah hahaha...
Lastly, I wanted to share that I am going to be sending out monthly love notes rather than weekly notes. I want to encourage you to join our Wise womb FB group as the Live interaction is of a greater value for myself and my community. I would like to get out from behind the written word and have more face to face interaction with you all to create more intimacy and deep connection with you. I share sometimes daily or weekly Live Videos there where you can message me or post a question on any topic and I will respond with a Live reply.